If You Stay



❮KINDLE❯ ➜ If You Stay ❤ Author Courtney Cole – E17streets4all.co.uk year old Pax Tate is an asshole Seriously He s a tattooed, rock hard bad boy with a bad attitude to match But he s got his reasons His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart fill year old Pax Tate is an asshole Seriously He s a tattooed, rock hard bad boy with a bad attitude to match But he s got his reasons His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart filled with guilt although he doesn t understand why What he does know is that he and his dad are left alone and with issues than they can count As Pax grew up, he tried to be the kid his father always wanted the perfect golden boy, If You ePUB Æ but it didn t work His dad couldn t overcome his grief long enough to notice and Pax couldn t keep up the impossible perfect fa ade So he slipped far, far from it Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn t want to deal with If he pretends that the emptiness isn t there, then it isn t, right Wrong And it s never apparent than when he meets Mila Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart He doesn t know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he d better figure it out because he needs her to breatheWhen memories of his mother s death resurface from where he s repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense Mila is the one the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart from his issues, from the emptiness But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it He knows that And he s working on it But is that enough to make her stay Please note If You Stay contains mature subject matter such as drug use and sexual situations It is intended for mature audiences.If You Stay

Courtney Cole is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling novelist who would eat mythology for breakfast if she could She loves giving advice, loving on her kids, red lipstick and blonde hair dye Courtney was born and raised in rural Kansas, but has since migrated south She now lives in Florida and writes beneath palm trees Learnabout Courtney and her books at courtneycolewrites Find her on Facebook at.

If You Stay PDF/EPUB ↠ If You  ePUB Æ
    If you re looking for a CBR and CBZ reader the impossible perfect fa ade So he slipped far, far from it Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn t want to deal with If he pretends that the emptiness isn t there, then it isn t, right Wrong And it s never apparent than when he meets Mila Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart He doesn t know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he d better figure it out because he needs her to breatheWhen memories of his mother s death resurface from where he s repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense Mila is the one the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart from his issues, from the emptiness But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it He knows that And he s working on it But is that enough to make her stay Please note If You Stay contains mature subject matter such as drug use and sexual situations It is intended for mature audiences."/>
  • Kindle Edition
  • 351 pages
  • If You Stay
  • Courtney Cole
  • English
  • 13 November 2018

10 thoughts on “If You Stay

  1. says:

    That my friends is how you open a book3.5 starsThe first chapter of If You Stay made me want to jump up and applaud A standing O if you will It was a bold, risky move but Courtney Cole nailed it She nailed it without coming across as being seedy or cheap BRAVO What came next was a a whole bunch of different It was raw It was unique It was a story about redemption I loved the circumstances surrounding Pax and Mila s relationship Being able to see inside Pax s head was the pulse of t That my friends is how you open a book3.5 starsThe first chapter of If You Stay made me want to jump up and applaud A standing O if you will It was a bold, risky move but Courtney Cole nailed it She nailed it without coming across as being seedy or cheap BRAVO What came next was a a whole bunch of different It was raw It was unique It was a story about redemption I loved the circumstances surrounding Pax and Mila s relationship Being able to see inside Pax s head was the pulse of the story You fall in love with a dick while falling in love with, wellhis dick He wears asshole like a runway model and is perfectly imperfect.I think what really made this book good was how Courtney Cole just jumped right in No toeing the water She took a running start and dove in head first She wasn t afraid to make Pax the asshole In doing that, the reader gets to experience falling in love right along with Mila It helps the reader understand how someone like Mila can see beneath the assery Courtney Cole also has an insane talent for writing steam There were a few scenes where I needed to bust out the plastic knickers Even if I wasn t a fan of the story, Pax and the first few chapters were enough to completely satisfy me Everything else was just an added bonus READ ON Reviewed at

  2. says:

    I was really excited for this book, because I m just as enthusiastic about self proclaimed, bad boy assholes with tats and a sketchy past, as everyone else I am, however, immune to bullshit. I don t like lazy, formulaic, and trite writing I m also tired of reading the same old clich d, played out stories of the heroine, justifying the hero s rude and inexcusable behaviors, because of his dark past And, I don t think sexist, and or misogynistic behavior lingo, is romantic at all Sorry I I was really excited for this book, because I m just as enthusiastic about self proclaimed, bad boy assholes with tats and a sketchy past, as everyone else I am, however, immune to bullshit. I don t like lazy, formulaic, and trite writing I m also tired of reading the same old clich d, played out stories of the heroine, justifying the hero s rude and inexcusable behaviors, because of his dark past And, I don t think sexist, and or misogynistic behavior lingo, is romantic at all Sorry I swear, I m going to STOP reading books featuring an ASSHOLE hero, with a passive, submissive, desperate, good girl heroine I was STRUGGLING to finish, and I would ve rated this a 1 5 if not for the ending So, I m going to try and explain my reasoning behind my generous rating Here goes The first chapter had me intrigued, I was hopeful, to say the least.Lines of coke blowjob intense OD moment POTENTIAL And, the sentiment or overall message of the story was good I could see what the author was attempting to accomplish I didn t necessarily buy it, but it was a nice thought second chances, forgiveness, love conquers all, hope, and all that jazz But, that was just about all that I liked about the story I couldn t stand PAX and MILA The story was told in DUAL POVs, but I couldn t differentiate between the two they sounded the same like they were one person Annoying And the cheesy insta love angle Instant turn off On top of that, Pax kept using the term, pussy in every other sentence, in a very degrading manner He called all kinds of women bar slut, hoe, whore, wench, etc But wait HE S A BAD BOY SO IT S OK, RIGHT NO, it s not OK, and it s fucking offensive Also, the whole good girl thing MILA had going on SPARE ME THE BULLSHIT I don t like sluts either, and sometimes you just have to call out a girl for her nasty actions, BUT this construction of good girl v bad girl, desirable v undesirable is so aligned with offensive, sexist, hegemonic, patriarchal ideology, that I just couldn t stomach it As a woman myself Another issue that rubbed me the wrong way was, the dude overdosed on cocaine Yet he kept claiming he wasn t addicted and that he didn t have drug problems Um, wtf That s extremely hard to believe he just quit all of a sudden, no withdrawals, nothing But he d been taking sleeping pills and other variations of drugs since he was 7 years old I just don t get how he wasn t addicted and didn t really have any drug problems it was just a coping mechanism to fill the void Sure, I can buy that, but that shit comes with a cost and it s called ADDICTION I don t really want to get into the issues I had with MILA, because she was so frustrating, stupid, and a desperate pushover But I guess I will mention that her father hit her mother occasionally I guess that s somehow supposed to explain her behavior explain her attraction to the druggie blank face Still, I had a hard time with the rationale behind the domestic abuse Mila justified her parents actions by stating that it was just because they were so passionately in loveI m not saying everyone involved in abusive relationships should just break it off completely and find someone new Sometimes, people make mistakes, but they can change for the better And sometimes, it takes a strong woman to forgive the lowlife that hit her Or, it could just be that the woman is scared to death, has her children to worry about, and other socio economic reasons why she chooses not to leave She could also just be humiliated I don t know There could be many reasons why a woman chooses to stay Regardless, I m not judging However, I just don t like the fact that the author, or MILA, chooses to explain domestic abuse as if it s no big deal, as if it s romantic somehow because that s what passionate lovers do THAT is what I had a problem with I strongly disagree It IS a big deal, and it doesn t signify healthy passion at the very least It s straight up wrong there s no justification for domestic abuse Finally, there was NO CHEMISTRY between PAX and MILA I just wasn t feeling it The whole big bad wolf thing was creepy and cheesy All in all, this story offered me nothing new, or unique I felt bad for Pax and his unfortunate childhood, but so what I didn t CARE in the end Overall, the story was just bland, played out, clich , and cheesy I say, skip this one

  3. says:

    3.75 StarsLove Never Fails Pax Tate is, as the author so honestly warns, an asshole But he s not your typical bad boy he s suffers from a tragic past that invades and torments his future He turns to drugs and sex to cope and would be perfectly happy permanently disappearing into the blackness of oblivionuntil Mila Mila Hill is sweet and good and full of life everything Pax is not She gives Pax a reason to want to change a reason to want to live As his defenses slowly crumble, 3.75 StarsLove Never Fails Pax Tate is, as the author so honestly warns, an asshole But he s not your typical bad boy he s suffers from a tragic past that invades and torments his future He turns to drugs and sex to cope and would be perfectly happy permanently disappearing into the blackness of oblivionuntil Mila Mila Hill is sweet and good and full of life everything Pax is not She gives Pax a reason to want to change a reason to want to live As his defenses slowly crumble, they reveal a secret so gut wrenching it threatens to push him back into oblivion for good I wasn t initially sure how connected to Pax I d become but as I read further, I found myself sinkingcomfortably into his story On one hand, Pax was crude, cold hearted, and made no apologies but on the other, he was REAL and consistent and I honestly ended up liking him I appreciated the fact that he fulfilled his asshole destiny and didn t immediately become cured Although he very much cared for Mila, his bad boy qualities were a stubborn habit to kick and weren t magically dissolved after falling for a girl The author did a wonderful job in bringing Pax s drug and emotional problems to life without making it feel overdone This story was extremely visual and certain scenes were a little difficult to read, but its in your face reality was refreshing Pax and Mila s emotional relationship felt genuine Pax s internal struggle was palpable and it broke my heart see how unworthy he found himself I truly wanted to see him redeemed Book Stats Genre Category Romance New Adult Steam Caliber Very steamy Romance Complicated and emotional, but one to root for Characters Damaged, arrogant, but redeemable hero Sweet, understanding heroine Plot Evolved at a believable pace Heavy storyline centered on teetering on the edge of addiction Writing Raw, gritty, and bold Successfully pulls the reader into the story POV First person Alternating dual perspectives Cliffhanger None Next Installment Follow up, continuing story

  4. says:

    Actual Rating 3.5 starsStarting with a bang and I mean really check out the opening paragraph for yourself If You Stay is narrated mainly by Pax, a drug addict with a past that has led him to want to give no shits about his life Our second POV is a sweet and innocent young girl, Mila, who meets Pax in the most unfortunate of ways I think this is one instance where a single POV would have been much better for me While I understand the appeal of a dual POV when it comes to a love story, Actual Rating 3.5 starsStarting with a bang and I mean really check out the opening paragraph for yourself If You Stay is narrated mainly by Pax, a drug addict with a past that has led him to want to give no shits about his life Our second POV is a sweet and innocent young girl, Mila, who meets Pax in the most unfortunate of ways I think this is one instance where a single POV would have been much better for me While I understand the appeal of a dual POV when it comes to a love story, especially of this nature where both characters are such opposites, I felt like one character Pax was muchdeveloped than the other,likeable, too, which might seem improbable when you first meet him, turning this book into a good read that could have been great if only I had cared for both sides equally Fortunately for me, it s Pax s story above all We meet him in his lowest of the lows as a drug addict who just doesn t give a f ck He s the ultimate bad boy whom every girl should stay away from He s not created for us to like him as a character, not to mention a love interest, but he was created as an obviously broken character who you have the strange impulse to want to fix This is what makes his character sympathetic You get to understand what s going on in his head and how badly he wants to change which makes all the difference I came to see him as someone very sweet who needs to be given a chance Mila takes that risk This girl, though, did not click with me She is the definition of a good girl , but this is not the reason why I disliked her She was simply too naive for my taste She jumps into a relationship with this guy with the immediate belief that he will change to become the perfect boyfriend material, even after Pax tells her that he will try not to her her he emphasizes on try Automatically, this would have become a red flag for me, Mila seemed to be oblivious to this warning, giving her heart to him so easily I also didn t like how she reacted when Pax finally unfolded his past Getting pissed at how he shut her out when he was dealing with such a traumatic memory was just not ok for me He needed someone to understand and leave him to deal, not someone who made him guilty for it Our personalities just did not mesh, mine and hers Even without our clashing minds, however, I never felt like I truly understood or got to know Mila She wasn t as fleshed out a character as Pax, which leads me to think I would have enjoyed this book muchhad we not gotten her perspective at all, and only saw her through Pax s eyes.The romance in the book is extremely hot and definitely R rated, they also do not lack chemistry, but on that note it s a primarily physical relationship Instead of taking time throughout the book to get to know each other on aemotional level, they focus on their physical attraction which, in reality, is fine as some couples do base themselves on their physical relationship, but as a reader I felt like the romance wassuperficial.This book, however, isthan a love story It s ultimately about Pax dealing with his past, and finding a way to get through it without ruining his life in the process It was an emotional read, for sure, with some very hard to imagine scenarios where you can t help but want to put yourself in the MC s shoes to try to take some of their pain away This is the part of the book that I liked the most and I think it was well executed Hard to read at times, but If You Stay is also an inspiring story when you consider how far Pax comes While I didn t love both characters, I predict that Mila will resonate with some readers better than I, making it a great reading experience all around as it s far from being a bad book Forof my reviews, visit my blog at Xpresso Reads

  5. says:

    I don t think there are many books that start off with the hero vomiting all over the heroine but this one does and it s quite a jaw dropping beginning that s for sure and I m happy to report that there is NO cliffhanger Our hero, Pax Tate, is a 24 year old super rich trustfund baby He s doing absolutely nothing with his life other than a long line of bar whores and every drug he can get his hand on His past is troubled with dark secrets long since buried Pax is angry, grief stricken and hea I don t think there are many books that start off with the hero vomiting all over the heroine but this one does and it s quite a jaw dropping beginning that s for sure and I m happy to report that there is NO cliffhanger Our hero, Pax Tate, is a 24 year old super rich trustfund baby He s doing absolutely nothing with his life other than a long line of bar whores and every drug he can get his hand on His past is troubled with dark secrets long since buried Pax is angry, grief stricken and headed down an everdestructive path where the sweet, forgiving darkness of oblivion is just another line of coke away.Mila Hill is herself not a stranger to loss and sadness but is dealing with things much better than Pax She first comes across him one dark, starry night on the beach when he is half hanging out of his car completely out of his face, covered in vomit and a couple of heartbeats away from an overdose induced cardiac arrest She calls an ambulance just as his heart stops beating and she has to perform CPR and he vomits all over her The paramedics arrive and take over but Mila can t stop thinking about him and goes to visit him in hospitalWhen Pax awakes and realises how close he came to losing everything and Mila walks into his hospital room, he is instantly taken by her She is his polar opposite the light to his darkness, the unclouded day to his stormy skies He sees something in her that awakens his own deeply buried sense of self preservation and he feels instinctively that he has to sort himself out to be a better man for her It s never going to be easy Mila doesn t really understand why he behaves the way he does, nor does Pax really and they follow a long and tortuous path to get to the truths buried in the past, to deal with these, and they are real shockers, and to be able to move on from them together.Pax was actually a great hero it really wasn t the most auspicious beginning, vomiting all over our heroine but he redeems himself and he does it well It s not like flicking a switch he doesn t go from drug addled poor little rich kid to alpha hero overnight It takes time and Courtney Cole does an amazing job of allowing this to develop slowly throughout the novel He makes mistakes, he atones for them, suffers the consequences and just has to weather the storm until Mila can finally accept him and everything that has happened and how he has behaved.Mila s a bit of a sweetheart she s lost her parents and she and her sister are struggling to continue running their restaurant and she s really not without her own demons I have to say that she exhibited the patience of a saint when dealing with Pax and all his problems right up until the point where she feels she just can t do it any Pax needs her though and is prepared to give her time to come to terms with all that has happened and all that has been revealed but is it too late This was a beautifully paced, very poignant romance with a multi layered story as the central couple had to deal with revelations and their own, sometimes angry, reactions to the situations they found themselves in It s a cautionary tale of drug use with some tough lessons to be learned Mila also has an older sister, Madison, who has suffered the same devastating loss and her story is coming up in book two and I m really looking forward to this and I connected well with her during this one.4 stars contemporary romance Forreviews, please visit Sinfully Sexy Book Reviews or visit us on Facebook.

  6. says:

    Starting off with a BANG, IF YOU STAY sucked me in, stole my heart, turned me on, and easily became on of my all time favorite books I can tell you right now that this book will be on my Top Ten Books of 2013 Courtney Cole has delivered one hell of a story that is sure to stay on your mind and in your heart for a long, long time I ll start with Pax, because wellthis is his book The first time I read the beginning of this book, my mouth dropped Now, it takes a lot to surprise me, but Pax Starting off with a BANG, IF YOU STAY sucked me in, stole my heart, turned me on, and easily became on of my all time favorite books I can tell you right now that this book will be on my Top Ten Books of 2013 Courtney Cole has delivered one hell of a story that is sure to stay on your mind and in your heart for a long, long time I ll start with Pax, because wellthis is his book The first time I read the beginning of this book, my mouth dropped Now, it takes a lot to surprise me, but Pax certainly did And I loved every minute of it Pax broke my heart, made me giggle , turned me on big time , and made me fall in love with him When you first meet him, you really do think he s an asshole, but I promise you, you will fall in love with him too Pax isthan just a pretty face dirty mouth trouble maker though He is a deep and complex character He s had to deal with some pretty serious trauma in his life As a result, he chose self destructive ways of dealing with his grief That is, until he meets Mila While their initial meeting is less than ideal, these two form a bond Yes, there is some attraction as well, but there is a true connection and chemistry between them Mila has also had some not so great things happen in her life I think they recognized that they shared a similar type of loss Although, they dealt with it in totally different ways Despite Pax s reputation and her concerns about what being with him would truly be like, Mila can t help but fall for him Let s talk about the steam level This book is seriously HOT I knew Courtney Cole could deliver on the sexy, but because Pax is such a raw character, the sex scenes were that much better I could go on in detail about my favorite scenes, as there are many, but I ll just highlight two key moments for me The painting and the shower Seriously Wow I want to briefly mention Mila s sister Madison I loved her and I appreciated the relationship she and Mila had We don t see Madison all that much in this book, but I really developed strong feelings for her character I think Madison also has an interesting story to tell I truly could go on and on about how much I loved this story, but I feel that it is best for the reader to experience on their own I will tell that I ve read this book three to four times now and it just got better every time I read it IF YOU STAY is raw, gritty, sexy, and in your face fantastic This is without a doubt my favorite book by Courtney Cole to date Quotes note that my copies were BETA copies, so the final quotes locations may be slightly different I will try very hard not to hurt you, he says I m fucked up So I can t promise that I won t But I promise I will try Okay, I whisper But try very hard Loc 1118 ARC BETA I m just not that good at relationships I haven t had any practice But if you stay with me, if you stayI promise that I will never leave you again I will never shut you out again Loc 2845 ARC BETA

  7. says:

    When I read the synopsis of this book, I just knew I would love Pax 24 year old Pax Tate is an asshole Seriously He s a tattooed, rock hard bad boy with a bad attitude to match But he s got his reasons.Pax is a user He uses drugs, alcohol and women to deal with his issues, to fill a void he has His mother died when he was young and he s never dealt with it He wants to be numb It s just easier that way Things change for Pax when he meets Mila Mila saves Pax, inways than one When I read the synopsis of this book, I just knew I would love Pax 24 year old Pax Tate is an asshole Seriously He s a tattooed, rock hard bad boy with a bad attitude to match But he s got his reasons.Pax is a user He uses drugs, alcohol and women to deal with his issues, to fill a void he has His mother died when he was young and he s never dealt with it He wants to be numb It s just easier that way Things change for Pax when he meets Mila Mila saves Pax, inways than one For the first time since I can remember, I don t want to be numb Mila makes me want to feel things with her and for her She wants me to be a better person simply so that I can be around herMila is dealing with the loss of her parents, but she copes in a different way She is an artist She has her studio and helps her sister run the family restaurant When she finds Pax on the beach one night, it changes her She knows he has issues, but she wants to be there for him, to be around him, to be with him Mila tries to help Pax with things, she supports him, encourages him and starts to fall for him Pax is falling for Mila too She is unlike any other woman he has ever met, and he wants to change for her They have a connection to each other, some definite chemistryI ve imprinted on you, I tell her laughing softly You re mine now And it s true She might not know it yet, but it is true. I think the author describes this story best This story is really about a man teetering on the edge he could have fallen either way, into the dark or into the light And he chose to land on his feet in the light, even though the light is harder and takeswork.Pax s journey was emotional, he was able to get past his issues and redeem himself Pax and Mila s story was beautiful The ending was perfect I really enjoyed this oneLove never fails, Mila And I ll never fail you again Thats a promise

  8. says:

    3 starsOverall I liked this book but I felt disconnected from it, too I felt like I was reading a fascinating and intriguing documentary about a couple with text book problems that were brought to life through well constructed dialogue Even though I felt like I was on the outside looking in, I still enjoyed this book Odd I knowbut there it is.

  9. says:

    3 4 StarsLove never fails He s gorgeous, and flawed and sexy And I have no idea what I m getting intoWell that quote just about says it all for Mila She stumbles upon Pax and their lives are NEVER the same If You Stay is a short story which is told in alternating povs As a reader you are immediately sucked in from the first couple of pages I found Pax s road to redemption and recovery well told Pax and Mila s connection and chemistry was strong I loved that there wasn t a cliffha 3 4 StarsLove never fails He s gorgeous, and flawed and sexy And I have no idea what I m getting intoWell that quote just about says it all for Mila She stumbles upon Pax and their lives are NEVER the same If You Stay is a short story which is told in alternating povs As a reader you are immediately sucked in from the first couple of pages I found Pax s road to redemption and recovery well told Pax and Mila s connection and chemistry was strong I loved that there wasn t a cliffhanger ending but a hea Overall, a good read

  10. says:

    4.25 stars Great book Pax was really an A hole but an honest one I liked how both characters said what was on their mind to each other No half truths or BS left unspoken Pax s dark tormenting secret was horrid I loved him Heehee And Mila was an excellent character as well She was so good to him and for him without being a doormat I would have given this book 5 stars if it wasn t for the authors overuse of the word P SSY Besides that minor detail this was an amazing find.

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